Tonight Vicki asked Jimmy what he was going to be when he grew up. His answer: "A Power Ranger."
Nickelodeon's Power Rangers Samurai is an agressively stupid show. My kids, however, love it in the same way I once loved truly great and high-quality kids shows like Land of the Lost or Scooby Doo. (The answer is yes, I was being sarcastic. Those shows were terrible.)
Let me attempt to explain the plot as I understand it.
There are 5 teen Samurai Rangers who have inherited mystical powers from their parents. Even though these "samurai" skills have been passed down from ancestors for some reason only one of them is actually of Asian decent. Their teacher, who's supposedly there to help them hone their skills, is a pacific islander who never seems to leave the house. The teenagers all run off to face danger while "Mentor" bakes pies and vacuums under the couch.
In order to activate their powers, the teens pull out cell phones and write chinese characters in the air. This has the strange effect of instantly changing them into their colorful Power Rangers outfits. Maybe it gives them super strength, too, but to me it looks like just a lazy way to change clothes.
Their leader is Jaden, the red Ranger. Jaden has a hair helmet to rival Justic Bieber's is about as emotive as a tree stump. The blue Ranger is Kevin, the nice guy. The pink Ranger is Mia, the ditzy one who's a terrible cook. The yellow Ranger is Emily, who's sentimental and nurturing. The green Ranger is Mike, the douchebag. Of course my son's favorite is the douchebag.
They also have these things called zords that are giant mechanic beasts that seem to exist solely for the purpose of fighting giant monsters while destroying lots of model buildings.
The bad guys are called Nighloks. They had been banished to some sort of netherworld by a previous generation of Power Rangers but now they're back with their gross and bizarre rubber costumes and campy overacting. The Nighloks send their henchmen, called Moogers, to menace the populace for no discernible reason until the Samurai Rangers show up and defeat them using lots of complicated accessories that make for expensive action figures.
All this is bad enough, but there's one truly loathsome aspect of this show: Spike and Bulk, the least comical comic relief in TV history. These guys have decided that a recurring role on a third-rate kids show is worth sacrificing their dignity.
The one positive I can mention is that the theme song totally sounds like a Tenacious D tune.
"OK," one might say, "maybe it's a stupid show, but what's the harm?" I'll give you a hint: imagine a 3-year-old running around the house chasing Nighloks and swinging a cardboard tube at crotch level and you'll start to understand what the harm is.
I visited my friend Lara at her home in Tokyo yesterday. She just had a baby boy, who is the proud owner of this adorable little pacifier that doubles as his very own mute button.
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